Thursday

BREAKING OUT OF THE "FRIEND ZONE" (PART IV)

TECHNIQUE #4 - LOGIC

I know, logic is one of the least sexy words in the english language. The French, at least, say logique. But just like a lawyer or a dork on the debate team, you can build an irrefutably logical case for why your "friend" should go to bed with you.

To wit: she knows you and knows you're a trust-worthy guy; knows you're not going to hit or hurt her; knows you're respectful and fun; knows you're not a pathetic nerd, because if you were she wouldn't be hanging around with you; knows you're not a stick-in-the-mud, stay-at-home cheapskate because the two of you often go out to dinner or the movies together; knows you went to a decent school (you did, didn't you?); knows you're a good dresser, because if you weren't the two of you certainly have a close enough relationship that she would have said something to you about your clothes; knows you're clean; knows you have a decent job; knows you give a great massage, because up until now you've been so deep in the "friend zone" she's actually asked you to massage her back, her neck; knows that you're anxious to please, so that if she said stick you're finger up my ass you'd be happy to oblige; knows that if having sex with you somehow caused her to fall in love with you, you'd be there for her. After all, you've been hanging around all this time without enjoying the benefits of sleeping with her; she's already slept with dudes that don't even compare to you and it made her embarrassed and miserable. With you, she'll wind up feeling like she's taking good care of herself - which seems to be way more important to a woman than a man.

In short, you're the perfect candidate for her to have sex and fall in love with because you're a well-liked, known quantity. You've been tested in the field and found to be a great friend. Fucking together is the next logical step. And if she counters with, "But sleeping together could ruin our great relationship," you shoot back with, "Wrong - it will only make it better. Much better." And that's the truth. Although sometimes a little awkward and embarrassing when you first get into, sex with someone you know and like most often explodes into a sexual delight as all the pent up feeling of friendship and caring about each other suddenly rushes to the surface, free at last to be expressed and acted upon.

Hooking up with you could very well blow her mind - in a good way. Wow, she thinks, whoever thought good old Jimmy here would be the greatest lay I've ever had. I want more!

So get to it, pal. You're already got to the place where you're discussing it openly - the elephant in the room has been acknowledged. Now it's time to build your case, step by step. Write down all your pros, don't leave anything out, and read 'em to her. It's going to be a convincing array of facts. Try it. You'll be fucking amazed at how effective it is. You'll be kicking yourself for having taken so long to unveil your case. Shit, you may even find yourself applying to law school. Talking your way into pussy works!

Okay, next columns are about PERSEVERANCE, TIMING, AND AN OFFER SHE CAN'T REFUSE THAT YOU'LL BE ONLY TOO HAPPY TO GIVE!

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