Just had a sobering realization:

the very name of my blog, the clever two word phrase I use to MOCK all those poor bastards out there who are always saying things like, "It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game," is a rationalization itself.

Think about it. A guy loses a tennis match and quips, "I came in second;" a woman loses her boyfriend to a room mate and says, "I'm only second best;" the company softball team loses the championship and declares, "Oh, well, we're second best."

Shit, the guy who lost the tennis match has lost dozens, maybe hundreds of times. And the girl who lost her boyfriend has been dumped more than she can bear to think about. And what about the softball team who came in second in a 6 team league in Toledo, Ohio? Second best in a very small universe.

The fact is, when we say we're second best we're trying to make ourselves feel good. I may not be first best, but I'm still pretty damn good. I'm second best. Hell you are! Let's face it, second best is a very exalted position. When it comes to tennis, you're probably not even 897th best. And that's only in your county.

And in the matter of attracting members of the opposite sex, do you really think you come in second? I mean, what about Hillary Duff? Or Julia Roberts? Or Brad Pitt? Or Tom Brady. Or the new secretary with the big tits in accounting? Or even fucking Carrot Head?

Let's face it, pal. If on any given Sunday you took all the people attending games in every NFL stadium and added the numbskulls together, that's how many folks are ahead of you on the feeding chain. At least.

So, stop saying you're second best. I forbid it. And I just may find a new name for my blog here. 'Cause I'll tell you one thing: when it comes to blogs, we're
so far down on the totem pole, you need a wormer. We don't even have fucking pictures!


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