Sunday

The Loser and Her Ex!

Back in her mid-twenties, The Loser had high, soft breasts and a marvelously flat belly. This attracted the eye of Bernie, a resident in radiology at New York Hospital. Although Bernie had a weak chin and receding hairline, it was offset to some extent by a wonderful sense of humor and, of course, BIG-TIME EARNING POTENTIAL!! They married.

The years went by, they had a few kids, and though it wasn’t a marriage made in heaven, they laughed a bit, screwed every third week, and took a terrific European vacation all of August.

Bernie started jogging, began lifting weights, and developed that confident patina of a successful middle-aged man. You know what happened next.

Old Bernie left wifey-poo for his 28 year old nurse of Danish descent. Although it was a decade ago, the ex-wife still believes that somehow he’s going to tire of the Dane and return.

Talk about a state of denial. Listen, ex-wife, Lady, Ma’am, we’ve got to face the truth here. Those splendid 36-Cs are now just inches above your waist. And your out-of-control neediness threatens to repel the few people you can still call friend. Think Bernie’s coming back to this?

What can you do about it?

3 Comments:

At 4:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

gotta be my ex you're referring to!

 
At 12:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

why wouldn't you write about a man who's been dumped...so sexist!

 
At 12:31 PM, Anonymous Lonely and Love Starved said...

Dear E-man, my husband left me for my cousin, second cousin/once removed, over 20 years ago. They have 3 kids, I don't have any. Because it's all in the family it keeps on getting back to me how bright and good-looking the kids are, how happy they are, how well my ex is doing in his cabinet business. I've never told a single soul this in my life before. I haven't been asked out on ONE SINGLE DATE since the break up. It is so hard keeping a happy face. What's a girl to do?

 

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